Political Acumen
THERESA May, what can I say,
What have you done to us.
I thought your job to govern
Not stir up this awful fuss.
Leaving pensioners to shiver
And babes without a nurse.
I thought your job to govern,
Not bestow on us a curse.
It’s a funny word this Brexit
And this EU place in Brussels.
It seems we want to free ourselves
From arguments and tussles.
Will we have left the Golden Age
No longer taking centre stage?
Will no-one want to buy our shoes
And go elsewhere to pick and choose.
And did we all miscalculate
When deciding we would leave
For now EU won’t tell us
What they have up their sleeve.
We won’t become despondent
Take up another tack,
And just remember old John Bull
And wave the Union Jack.
We don’t want those EU breakfasts
Nor your dodgy export wines,
With all this global warming
We can nurture English vines.
We don’t want your equine chops
Nor your fat escargot dips,
We’re mostly vegetarian,
And we have oven chips.
We don’t want your sauerkraut
Nor wishy-washy beers
We’ve got our English cider
The nation’s drink that cheers.
We don’t want your Belgian chocolates
This evil trade must cease.
We’re very figure conscious now
Lest we become obese.
We don’t want your citrus teas
On drinks we need not stint
For we can always grow our own
And change to peppermint.
And we can fish our waters
And keep it for ourselves.
We can grow our peas and taters
Stock up our pantry shelves.
You think we’re short of fossil fuels
Across the English Channel.
But we take out a tile or two –
Put in a solar panel.
We don’t want petroleum
We’ve wind farms here, en masse.
We can do our fracking anywhere.
Release our own free gas.
We know that we can hold our own –
Collect our golden honey.
If things should go from bad to worse
We can always eat a bunny.
Alison Gardiner
Stroud
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